In Need of a Rant

Yea, that's what some of these are going to be; rants. Fuck it. Have you ever let someone into your life, then screwed it up, and now their gone? And I'm not talking about a lover. I mean a friend. Yea, those people. I really don't have many anymore, because they think I need a therapist or some stupid shit. I'm perfectly fine, but they can't accept the real me. The one who hates and hates and can't stop hating things, because I can't. Isn't that a regular emotion? I don't know, they are all wack. Anyways they said I 'changed' when really, they were just discovering who I am. It hurts of course, now that they have removed themselves from my life. I really do want they back. But... I can't get them back. Age is a major factor, and I guess I'm just not old enough to be friends with someone who is in their thirty's. Yea, I'm just a kid, what would I know. I have never had a boy/girlfriend, can't even keep what people I have meet close, any of that shit. I guess I'm too different. Is this still a rant, or something depressing? It's pretty depressing to me. I don't know if I can write some of this story. Fuck this... At least it helps to write this. A little. I just want to say so many bad things to those people, but I can't because... I don't know. Would that make it worse? I don't even know. I guess I'll never be a people person, no matter how much I try. Of course, I wish I had the courage of suicide people, but I don't, which is a shame. So don't worry, I won't be hanging myself in my closet any time soon. Though I might go on a killing spree... some day :)

Well... anything else? Prolly not... I ate a whole bunch of cherry tomatoes. They make me feel a little better. Hopefully I'll be able to write soon and not reflect depression into it. Can't wait for the fireworks convention. That'll take my mind off of things.